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If I learned one thing from watching football over the weekend, it's that I'm 90 percent sure could go on "Dancing with the Stars" tomorrow -- without a partner -- and win the Mirror Ball Trophy (don't ask me why I know the name of the trophy). Mood. OAKLAND RAIDERS (@RAIDERS) Malik Taylor Jersey If that's not the best fourth-quarter sideline dance you've ever seen, then I don't know what is. Honestly, owner Mark Davis should probably be giving Lynch at least $100,000 in bonus money every time he does something ridiculous as sort of a "Thanks for being so crazy that no one in Oakland seems to remember that we're moving to Vegas in three years" type bonus. Lynch seems like the kind of guy who would appreciate a good bonus, and he would probably appreciate it even more if half the bonus was paid in Skittles. You know who else would probably enjoy a good bonus? All cheerleaders. And if they don't get a bonus, they should definitely get some sort of hazard pay because working as a cheerleader in an stadium seems pretty dangerous, and a poor cheerleader found that out the hard way over the weekend when she got trucked by a cameraman. Ashley (@ashwagner13) Ouch! That hit by the cameraman was basically a crude re-enactment of what the defense did to the on Sunday. Now, it's not clear if our cheerleader friend will show up on the Chiefs' injury report this week, but at least there are people out there trying to find out what her playing status is for Week 3. . Can we get an injury update on that Royce Newman Jersey cheerleader? Andrew DeWitt (@AndrewRDeWitt) Hopefully the Chiefs reply because that's pivotal injury information, especially if you're in a cheerleader fantasy league, and who's not in a cheerleader fantasy league? Anyway, lets stop talking about cheerleaders getting truck-sticked and talk about something way more important, like who's going to win in Week 3. Actually, before I get to the picks, here's your weekly reminder to check out all the picks from every NFL writer here at CBSSports.com. The reason you should this week is because you're going to want to write down all of Jamey Eisenberg's picks and use them for yourself. Through two weeks, he's 20-11 picking games against the spread, which means I should probably also start using his picks because they seem to be working out slightly better than mine. By the way, if you want to make fun of me for all of the wrong picks I made last week -- and why wouldn't you? -- you can do that in the comment section . I mean, I picked a team quarterbacked by to win a prime-time game last week, so I definitely deserve to be mocked. Speaking of Dalton, here's a dog in a jersey. I'm pretty sure he lost some serious money gambling on the Bengals in Week 2 because that's the only way to explain the look of horror on his face. On the other hand, that dog also looks like he might have been forced to sit through three straight hours of watching the Bengals offense. If a terrified dog in a Bengals jersey doesn't put you in a mood to read , I don't know Kylin Hill Jersey what will. Let's get to the picks. Baltimore (2-0) vs. Jacksonville (1-1) in London 9:30 a.m. (Yahoo!, local TV in Jacksonville and Baltimore) I can't say this with 100 percent certainty, but I'm pretty sure this game represents the first step in the NFL's plan to make every millennial alive a fan. Since millennials don't have cable, the league has decided to , and we all know that millennials are going to watch because millennials will watch anything for free, even if it involves . Speaking of Bortles, the only thing that has been uglier than his career in Jacksonville has been my ability to pick games that take place on foreign soil. Since the beginning of the 2015 season, I've somehow managed to whiff on every single pick on any game being played in London. It's a two-year run of ineptitude that has only been matched by Bortles' play on the field. The bad news for the Jaguars this week is that Bortles will be going up against a defense that's only allowing five points per game through two weeks this season. It's the mismatch of the century. Imagine Joey Chestnut going up against a vegan in a hamburger eating contest and you'll get an idea of the type of mismatch I expect Sunday. The bottom line here is that I'm picking the Ravens because how can I pick acro s the ocean to get to the game. The Ravens will set sail from the Port of Baltimore immediately after their Week 2 game.: Baltimore Ravens (@Ravens) Note: The Ravens are not Green Bay Packers Home Office actually taking a cruise ship to the game, which is probably for the best because there's a 50 percent chance it would've turned into a party boat situation times one million. The pick: Ravens 23-10 over Jaguars Atlanta (2-0) at Detroit (2-0) 1 p.m. ET (Fox) If the want to exorcise the demons of their LI lo s, a win over Detroit would be a good place to start, and that's mainly because Atlanta's whole "blowing a gigantic second-half lead" thing kind of started against the . The last time these two teams played, in 2014, the Falcons blew a 21-0 halftime lead in a 22-21 lo s. I would say it's the worst blown lead that I've ever seen, but we all watched Super Bowl LI, so we know that's not true. Anyway, after picking against the Falcons in Week 2, I feel like it might be time to give up on picking against them ever again. The Falcons don't look like a team that's scarred by their Super Bowl lo s, they look like a team that's out to annihilate anyone who might try and stop them from making a return trip to the Super Bowl. I haven't seen anyone look this determined to destroy everything in their path since Rambo came back in "First Blood: Part II". The scariest thing about the Falcons is that their offense has been borderline unstoppable over the past year. Since the beginning of the 2016 season, Atlanta has put up 23 or more points in 20 of their 21 games, including the playoffs. I'm going to pick the Falcons here, but I hope that no Charles Woodson T Shirts matter what happens in this game, the bromance between and doesn't end because I'm not sure I could take it if Matty Twice broke up. Offseason's newest Bromance? Matt Ryan & Matthew Stafford. Matty Twice went on a double date John Breech (@johnbreech) By the way, this is somehow the only game in Week 3 being played between two undefeated teams, so we probably shouldn't take it for granted, which I'm only bringing up because after watching Cardinals-Colts on Sunday, I'm never taking good football for granted ever again. The pick: Falcons 30-23 over Lions Seattle (1-1) at Tenne see (1-1) 4:05 p.m. ET (Fox) The one thing that scares me about the this year is that I'm pretty sure they might have the worst offensive line I've ever seen. It's hard to describe how bad they are, so let me just sum it up by saying that what the Death Star did to Alderaan is basically what o